Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Combat Boots

Remember the one liners from childhood, like your momma’s so big that… and your momma wears combat boots….

Well, it’s true.  This bigger- by- the- day momma is sporting combat boots.  I’m in a battle. 

If you too have chosen to adopt children from “hard places” you are too.  We weren’t drafted, we willingly signed up. Not a two or four year stint, but a lifelong promise to love.  Many days it feels like I’m battling with my kids, but it’s really a battle for my kids.  Some of us are fighting for physical health, some emotional health and/or mental health. Some, are fighting for all of the above. 

But we aren’t just fighting a battle against flesh and blood, it’s a spiritual battle.  We’re battling for healing and wholeness. What keeps me fighting is knowing who wins.

And I trust Him.  He didn’t mess up when he placed my kids in my home and heart.  It wasn’t a mistake when He placed yours with you.  I know He loves us, and He loves our kids---- the same kids He brought to us with broken hearts, sometimes broken bodies and all with lost souls.

Some days it hurts to love them.  Our hearts are punctured with burdens we never dreamed or expected.  Some days our bodies get hurt as we love and hold a raging child.  Some days our minds fight the fear of tomorrow.  Unfortunately, our children are suffering in the
cross-fire of our battling for their best.  And let’s not forget our “tummy” kids who are wounded when the home they knew is changed into a battle zone right in front of them.

Yes, this is the battle we’re called to fight.  But people, we (that’s all of us who adopt kids from “hard places”) need you.  We cannot fight it alone- even when we try so hard to be strong.  We, need to round up some support troops.  We need friends who love us and our children and who understand this is more than just being tired mommies and daddy's.   People who understand we obeyed God’s calling.   

We need y’all to pray for us and some days we need more.  We won’t likely ask you or tell you we need it.  That would feel like waving a white flag of surrender.  We are thankful for the days you sense it.  The days you come around the cubicle wall with Kleenex and hugs when you over hear the sounds of war. 

We need you to understand why, when a simple question like “how’s the boys”,  cause us to break out into sobs and we are never able to answer you. We might need you to offer practical things like to cook dinner or pick up medications so we can just hold and love on our kids at the end of an especially rough day of battle. 

We need each other- fellow warriors- to encourage us and remind us there is Hope in the One who has already won the battle for us.

Mostly, we need our Church, the Body of Christ, to shelter us.  It has to be the place where we can always go when there is nowhere else to turn- the place where it’s safe to be real and broken and scared. 

When I first put on my boots, I thought it would be a temporary battle.  Maybe a year or two and then our family would be fixed- healed- whole.  Five years in, and the battle rages on; it rages stronger, and longer.  Unless God chooses to do a miracle, it looks like I’ll be sporting combat boots for a really long time.   And,most likely so will you.

So, my fellow boot wearing parents I leave you with these words from the Mighty Warrior himself:

Isaiah 41:9b-10
“You are my servant, I have chosen you and have not cast you away.  Fear not, for I am with you.  Be not dismayed for I am your God.  I will strengthen you.  Yes, I will help you.  I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Look around- see anybody in boots?  

Happy Wednesday Y'all!


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