And even then, we don't always get it.
Alzheimer's changes the dynamic of everything we consider normal.
Eating, talking, watching TV, bathing. Sleeping or not.
So, her being up and dressed at 3am Thursday morning wasn't surprising. The call, letting us know she had fallen and broken her hip, that was.
Surgery was a must- but at 90 is also pretty scary.
And, we aren't about to leave her alone so we've been happy to spend the last four days at the hospital with her.
As is common with the disease, the longer she is there, out of her normal environment, the more of the disease we see. Add intense pain from the surgery and fall, pain meds, complete strangers rotating in and out of the room- sticking and poking her, weird noises and smells- all adds up to some pretty long days and longer nights.
And I knew last night when I looked at her eyes and she wasn't there that it would be a long night.
And it was.
She didn't sleep.
For nearly 12 hours.
Every so often, she'd remind me I needed to go get quilts off the couch and make my bed, because I had been working so hard.
She'd tell me to get something to eat out of the kitchen.
She did not know I was Robin.
The daughter-in-law who adores her.
And since I was apparently one of those people, she was polite when I'd tell her to leave her oxygen alone, not to pull at her IV, encourage her not to pull at her staples, or remind her again what the funny boots on her feet were.
But, every once in a while she'd put down the sheets and look for my hand. And I'd let her find it. And I'd hold hers. And she'd settle for just a minute, before starting to fold again.
When asked, she told the nurses she was in her closet, putting away her laundry. "There's so much" she'd say.
I certainly can identify with that :)
So I folded with her.
I'd hand her a towel which is easier to manage than the heavy blankets and she'd fold it and give it back to me. I'd shake it out and hand it back. She was content with that for about 25 folds. She'd hold it up and ask, "isn't it beautiful"?
And sleepy as I was, treasured each fold and every minute because I know this journey isn't over and we don't know where it will lead. Wherever that is, I'm pretty sure there will be lots of folding along the way.
We're praying for her continued healing- she is strong, and brave and doing well.
And selfishly asking for extra strength for the journey.
Happy Sunday y'all.