Backwards. I used to think of it as a negative- loosing ground. Having to start over. When we started foster parenting, and now as adoptive parents, backwards has taken on an entirely new meaning. It feels like I live my life going backwards.
Progress in therapy- then boom- back to where we started. Progress in getting them to bed at night; and something brings out a fear in them, that nobody can see and we're back to the 1 hour hold my hand till I fall asleep.
Thankfully, God is giving me a different perspective on backwards. A thrill ride perspective, if you will. I love roller coasters, and riding backwards is my favorite, you get the thrill, but see things completely different (that is, if you keep your eyes open and look)
So, I think of my life as a roller coaster - and backwards is the way I get to not start over, but just see things from a different angle. To get new perspective, and then when we marching forward for however long, a day, a week, a month- if I'm brave enough to look, I get to see things with fresh eyes.
Yes, my life is going a different direction. This time of year, I'm reminded how many of our friends and family members are getting ready to be empty-nesters, or are there already. I get a little jealous when I look at the coaster ahead- while I've got one close to solo flying, we still have about 13 more years of parenting before my all birdies fly the coop; because we chose to go backwards, grab a couple of kids and are start again.
I wouldn't trade this coaster ride for anything, it is a thrill and joy that keep me learning the faster I go backwards, the more precious the view!
Buckle up! It's a fast one.
check out all the details here: http://thegypsymama.com/